STUDMETALDEATHCRUNCH

It's nearing the end of school, and the teachers are close to giving up. In History class yesterday, my teacher literally told us to "go ahead and do whatever you want." Unfortunately, Internet was down until the last twenty minutes of class, so we were stuck playing minesweeper with the volume up really loud. After approximately an hour of small explosion sounds and increasing frustration, Internet was restored and the world was in order. Of course, the first thing one does when in this situation is to google "why is my teacher so weird." This lead us to one of those criminal record sites, which had us sign up in order to access information. No one wanted to use their own email, so we plugged in one of the middle school teacher's official school email, under the name STUDMETALDEATHCRUNCH, THEDOOMBRINGER. Would you like to receive email updates? Hell yes! Then we researched our history teacher, because why not? After ten minutes of "please wait, loading" stuff, the site finished its search. "Is your birthday really April 17th?" our teacher slowly narrowed his eyes in our direction and squinted, raising one eyebrow slowly. "Ummm..." He got up and came over to our table, puzzled look still intact. Once he saw the computer screen, his eyes widened, "that's a list of the places I've lived," he said in a mildly curious monotone. We explained, and he laughed at STUDMETALDEATHCRUNCH. Well, who wouldn't, really?